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albrie:

wHEN PEOPLE ASK YOU WHAT YOUR MOST TREASURED POSSESSION IS AND THEN JUDGE ME WHEN I SAY IT’S MY MACBOOK WOW SORRY DID YOU WANT ME TO SAY A LOCKET MY GREAT AUNT ALICE’S GRANDFATHER’S SON HANDCRAFTED FROM KING ARTHUR’S SWORD WELDED WITH PHOENIX TEARS AND THE BLOOD OF A WOOD NYMPH NO OKAY I FUCKING LOVE MY MACBOOK NOW SHUT THE FUCK UP AND WATCH HOW I CAN SCROLL WITH TWO FUCKING FINGERS OKAY THAT”S BETTER THAN ANY LOCKET

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blackfemalepresident:

you deserve to be in a relationship with a person who doesnt make you compete for their affection and never has you guessing where you stand with them

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vivianvivisection:

jonesdavid813:

h0llo:

Putting on makeup is such a spiritual experience I watch myself go from a 3 to a 9 right in front of my mirror I love it

no, if you are putting on makeup, I don’t care who you are or what you look like, you go from about a 10 to 1

keep talking shit you gonna go from a basic ass 2 to a 6-feet-under

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